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	Kilduff-Wirtanen Legion Post 74 • 38 Main Street • PO Box 761 Brookline, NH 03033-0671
April 2008 Newsletter Kilduff-Wirtanen American Legion Post 74, Brookline, NH meets the 4^th Thursday of the month* at 38 Main Street Brookline. Meetings begin at 1900 hours (7PM). *Nov meeting held 3^rd Thursday. If you wish to join or have questions about the American Legion, please call one of the Post Officers.
Commander	Ruth H. Wrigley	14 McIntosh Rd	Brookline, NH 03033	603 672-7895	rhwrigley@aol.com
1^st. Vice Commander	Bill Graham	37 Averill Rd	Brookline, NH 03033	603 673 0881	bibst@charter.net
2^nd Vice Commander	Grover Farwell	107 Old Milford Rd	Brookline, NH 03033	603 673 4282	lfarwell@peoplepc.com
Adjutant	Bill Graham	37 Averill Rd	Brookline, NH 03033	603.673.0881	bibst@charter.net
Treasurer	Ben Perreault Jr.	5 Smith Rd	Brookline, NH 03033	603.672.7667	bperreau@charter.net
Sergeant at Arms	George Farwell	37 Mason Rd	Brookline, NH 03033	603 673 4990
Chaplain	Ed Zandrovec	14 Potanipo Hill Rd	Brookline, NH 03033
Historian	Del Porter	PO Box 17	Brookline, NH 03033	603 673 4287	Delro033@aol.com

Next Meeting:

24 April at 7:00 PM

March Meeting Minutes

Meeting called to order at 1907 by Commander Wrigley. 7 members present. Colors advanced, prayer offered, POW/MIA empty chair recognized, prayers offered for those lost and unaccounted for and the Preamble recited.

Minutes: The Minutes of the March 2008 meeting were read, moved to accept, seconded and approved.

TREASURERS REPORT: Ben Perreault, the Post Treasurer, read the latest statement of funds. He stated that 2 checks were written last month: one to PSNH for $27.40 to pay for the electric bill and one to Lorden Oil for $625.31 to pay for heating oil. George Farwell made a motion that the Quartermasters report be accepted as read and Del Porter seconded the motion. The motion passed unanimously.

· The Post received a letter from the Town of Brookline concerning Real Estate Exemption for the Post Meeting building. Greg d’Arbonne sent the papers to Ben Perreault who filled out the papers and had Ruth Wrigley sign for 2007 – 2008 and is waiting for Bill Graham to sign for 2008 – 2009 year. Greg will submit the papers to Town Hall once they are complete.

· The Girl Scouts asked the Post to donate funds to purchase Girl Scout cookies that will be sent to the Troops overseas. Greg d’Arbonne made a motion that the Post expends $42 to pay for a case of Girl Scout cookies to send to the Troops overseas. Ed Zandrovec seconded the motion. The motion passed unanimously.

· Installation for the Post 74 slate of 2008 Legion officers is scheduled for the May 22 meeting. The slate of officers to be voted on at the April meeting are:

· The two personnel who presented the slideshow of their Iraq and Afghanistan tours last year were unavailable this past month to ask if they want to join the Post. Ruth Wrigley will try to contact them again this month.

· Post 200: There are a number of names on the Post 200 list. Commander Wrigley asked for volunteers to take 3 or 4 names and call them and ask if they would like to join our Post. The list will be available after the meeting.

· Commander Wrigley stated there was very good participation by the Post at the Middle School for their Veterans at the School event. She thanked everyone for their support in this very worthwhile event.

· Commander Wrigley stated she received the Nashua Post Newsletter and has it for anyone who would like to see it.

· There are enough Poppies for the upcoming Memorial Day so the Post can use them as a fund raiser.

· Pot Luck Supper: The Hollis VFW Post will hold a Pot Luck Supper on April 26th from 4 to 6 PM at the Hollis Lawrence Barn Community Center. They are inviting all members of the Brookline American Legion Post and the Seniors Club of Hollis. All Post members are encouraged to attend. As with all Pot Luck Suppers, attendees bring a dish that will serve themselves and a few others so everyone can share a little with others.

· Greg d’Arbonne reported that he attended the Brookline Boy Scout Troop Leadership meeting. He stated, as the sponsoring organization for the Troop, the Troop equipment really belongs to the Post. This is in case the Troop ever folded; the equipment would go to the Post. Greg stated he will draft up a formal Memorandum of Agreement (MOA) between the Post and the Troop to delineate that the Post is not responsible for damages or injury caused by the Troops equipment and that the Troop is responsible for all maintenance and costs of the equipment.

· The Brookline Boy Scout Troop will hold an Eagle Court of Honor on 5 April starting at 1 PM at the Brookline Community Church. Post members are invited to attend.

· The Brookline Snowmobile Club asked if they could use the Post Meeting building on June 17th to hold a meeting at 1900. Greg d’Arbonne made a motion that the Post allow the Brookline Snowmobile Club to use the building on June 17t for their meeting. Del Porter seconded the motion. The motion passed unanimously.

· Commander Wrigley stated Royal Miller, Jr., from the Nashua post, is in the hospital. She asked that we keep him in our thoughts and prayers.

· Del Porter stated the price of oil is continually rising with no downturn expected. The building the Post uses is heated throughout the winter but is only used for 3 meetings a month (American Legion, VFW and the Brookline Snowmobile Club). He thinks we should consider shutting the heat off or some similar idea for the winter months so everyone can save money on heating the building. Ben Perreault stated he agrees with Del. He said the Post’s greatest expenditures are for PSNH and oil. He feels it would be better to spend a majority of our money on Veterans not on oil to heat the Post Meeting Hall. The Post members present at the meeting discussed this subject and agreed something needs to be done. The subject was tabled until a meeting in the summer.

There being no further business, the closing prayer was said, the colors were retired, and the meeting adjourned at 1945. The next meeting is April 24, 2008 at 1900.

Commander’s Comments

We will be casting our ballot at the next meeting for the slate of officers for 2009. Please vote.

Also the installation of these officers will be at the May meeting. Take it easy on yard clean up.

Do You Have An E-mail Address?

E-mailing the newsletter saves mailing costs. If you have e-mail access, send a message to Greg, at Gdarbo6844@aol.com. Addresses are for the exclusive use of the members to pass information and not to be sold or freely passed to others outside the Post without formal consent of the member. No funds solicitation is authorized via e-mail.

News For & From Members

The VFW Post in Hollis has invited our Post to attend a Potluck Supper on the 26^th of April at the Lawrence Barn in Hollis from 4 to 6 PM. If you have never attended one of these before, you are missing out on a great time. This is a great event to just relax and talk with other Post members. The VFW Post from Hollis and the Seniors Club of Hollis are also attending so it should be a good group.

Please bring a Salad, a Casserole or a Dessert to share with the group. Plates and silverware will be provided. We ask, if you are attending, please call Mabel Hills by April 21^st (tel: 465-3508) so we can make sure we have enough plates, etc. and have a balanced meal.

Jeremy Gath from Boy Scout Troop 260 of Brookline Attains Rank of Eagle Scout

On April 5, Jeremy Gath was awarded his Eagle Scout at an Eagle Court of Honor. Jeremy earned a minimum of 21 merit badges and completed a project to benefit the community. Jeremy designed and built a trail kiosk at the trail head entrance to the old cemetery on Rocky Pond Road. Jeremy was awarded a Certificate from our Post for his extraordinary accomplishment. Our congratulations to Jeremy and his family.

News of Interest to Veterans

Washington (February 28, 2008) – The Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) is designating $37 million to fund at least 2,250 new transitional housing beds by giving grants to local providers.

“This is the largest one-time designation of funds for homeless program in VA’s history,” said Secretary of Veterans Affairs Dr. James B. Peake. “This is a great opportunity for community organizations to join VA in its mission of eradicating chronic homelessness among veterans.”

The grants are intended to offset the operating expenses for transitional housing facilities operated by state and local governments, Indian tribal governments, and faith-based and community-based organizations that are capable of providing supported housing and supportive services for homeless veterans.

VA began its national effort to eradicate chronic homelessness 20 years ago by providing $5 million for a pilot program to support contract residential care and to create domiciliary care for homeless veterans in San Diego.

Today, VA supports more than 15,000 beds in transitional housing facilities or in VA residential treatment programs nationwide. The Department is the largest federal provider of direct assistance to the homeless, including outreach and case management, treatment, rehabilitation, transitional residential care, therapeutic work and assistance with permanent housing. As part of its homelessness programs, VA also supports special programs for the treatment and rehabilitation of those suffering from mental illness and addictive disorders.

Washington (from the Military Spouse Career Center website) – The Internal Revenue Service today warned taxpayers to beware of several current e-mail and telephone scams that use the IRS name as a lure. The IRS expects such scams to continue through the end of tax return filing season and beyond.

The IRS cautioned taxpayers to be on the lookout for scams involving proposed advance payment checks. Although the government has not yet enacted an economic stimulus package in which the IRS would provide advance payments, known informally as rebates to many Americans, a scam which uses the proposed rebates as bait has already cropped up.

The goal of the scams is to trick people into revealing personal and financial information, such as Social Security, bank account or credit card numbers, which the scammers can use to commit identity theft.

Typically, identity thieves use a victim's personal and financial data to empty the victim's financial accounts, run up charges on the victim's existing credit cards, apply for new loans, credit cards, services or benefits in the victim's name, file fraudulent tax returns or even commit crimes. Most of these fraudulent activities can be committed electronically from a remote location, including overseas. Committing these activities in cyberspace allows scamsters to act quickly and cover their tracks before the victim becomes aware of the theft.

People whose identities have been stolen can spend months or years – and their hard-earned money – cleaning up the mess thieves have made of their reputations and credit records. In the meantime, victims may lose job opportunities, may be refused loans, education, housing or cars, or even get arrested for crimes they didn't commit.

At least one scheme using the word "rebate" as part of the lure has been identified. In that scam, consumers receive a phone call from someone identifying himself as an IRS employee. The caller tells the targeted victim that he is eligible for a sizable rebate for filing his taxes early. The caller then states that he needs the target's bank account information for the direct deposit of the rebate. If the target refuses, he is told that he cannot receive the rebate.

This phone call is a scam. No legislation has yet been enacted that would allow the IRS to provide advance payments to taxpayers or that determines the details of those payments. Moreover, the IRS does not force taxpayers to use direct deposit. Those who opt for direct deposit do so by completing the appropriate section of their tax return, with bank routing and account information, when they file; the IRS does not gather the information by telephone.

The IRS has seen several variations of a refund-related bogus e-mail which falsely claims to come from the IRS, tells the recipient that he or she is eligible for a tax refund for a specific amount, and instructs the recipient to click on a link in the e-mail to access a refund claim form. The form asks the recipient to enter personal information that the scamsters can then use to access the e-mail recipient's bank or credit card account.

In a new wrinkle, the current version of the refund scam includes two paragraphs that appear to be directed toward tax-exempt organizations that distribute funds to other organizations or individuals. The e-mail contains the name and supposed signature of the Director of the IRS's Exempt Organizations business division.

This e-mail is a phony. The IRS does not send unsolicited e-mail about tax account matters to individual, business, tax-exempt or other taxpayers.

Filing a tax return is the only way to apply for a tax refund; there is no separate application form. Taxpayers who wish to find out if they are due a refund from their last annual tax return filing may use the "Where's My Refund?" interactive application on this Web site, IRS.gov. The only official IRS Web site is located here at http://www.irs.gov/.

Another new scam brought to IRS attention contains features not seen before by the IRS. Using a technique calculated to get almost anyone's attention, the e-mail notifies the recipient that his or her tax return will be audited. This is the first scam of which the IRS is aware that uses this to get the victim to respond.

Unusual for a scam e-mail, it may contain a salutation in the body addressed to the specific recipient by name. Most scam e-mails seen by the IRS are sent using the same technique used by spammers, in which hundreds of thousands of messages are sent to potential victims based on Internet address. Because of the volume, the typical scam e-mail is not personalized.

This e-mail instructs the recipient to click on links to complete forms with personal and account information, which the scammers will use to commit identity theft.

This e-mail is a phony. The IRS does not send unsolicited, tax-account related e-mails to taxpayers.

This bogus e-mail is addressed to businesses, accountants and "Treasury" managers. It instructs them to download information on tax law changes by clicking on a series of links to publications on businesses, estate taxes, excise taxes, exempt organizations and IRAs and other retirement plans. The IRS believes that clicking on a link downloads malware onto the recipient's computer. Malware is malicious code that can take over the victim's computer hard drive, giving someone remote access to the computer, or it could look for passwords and other information and send them to the scamster. There are other types of malware, as well.

The urls contained in the link are not legitimate IRS Web addresses. All IRS.gov Web page addresses begin with http://www.irs.gov/.

In a current telephone scam, a caller claims to be an IRS employee who is calling because the IRS sent a check to the individual being called. The caller states that because the check has not been cashed, the IRS wants to verify the individual's bank account number. The caller may have a foreign accent.

In reality, the IRS leaves it entirely up to the individual to choose to cash or not cash a paper check. The IRS has no business need to know, and does not ask for, bank account or similar information, except when taxpayers indicate on their tax return that they are opting for the direct electronic deposit of their refund. In that case, however, it is the individual's responsibility to provide the IRS with the correct bank routing and account numbers on the tax return; the IRS does not contact taxpayers to verify the information.

Anyone wishing to access the IRS Web site should initiate contact by typing the IRS.gov address into their Internet address window, rather than clicking on a link in an e-mail or opening an attachment.

Those who have received a questionable e-mail claiming to come from the IRS may forward it to a mailbox the IRS has established to receive such e-mails, phishing@irs.gov, using instructions contained in an article titled "How to Protect Yourself from Suspicious E-Mails or Phishing Schemes." Following the instructions will help the IRS track the suspicious e-mail to its origins and shut down the scam. Find the article by visiting IRS.gov and entering the words "suspicious e-mails" into the search box in the upper right corner of the front page.

Those who have received a questionable telephone call that claims to come from the IRS may also use the phishing@irs.gov mailbox to notify the IRS of the scam.

The IRS has issued previous warnings on scams that use the IRS to lure victims into believing the scam is legitimate. More information on identity theft, phishing and telephone scams using the IRS name, logo or spoofed (copied) Web site is available on this Web site. Enter the terms "phishing," "identity theft" or "e-mail scams" into the search box in the upper right corner of the front page.

Tilton, NH – It’s not every day you get to work with your heroes, but at the New Hampshire Veterans Home (NHVH), you do. Steve Hanakard, from Hebron, NH, volunteers with his wife, Carol, at the Veterans Home every week. He says, “It’s amazing. We’ve heard veterans’ stories about bombing missions over Europe, what it was like to be in Pearl Harbor when the Japanese attacked, the flag raising at Iwo Jima, and so much more. It’s a privilege to be involved. We feel like we get much more than we give.”

The volunteer program at the New Hampshire Veterans Home offers many opportunities to work in diverse areas. Volunteer coordinator Lisa Perry says, “The biggest need right now is for people to assist our residents on shopping trips on Wednesday afternoons and Thursday mornings. We provide the transportation, but we need volunteers to help push residents’ wheelchairs in the stores. We also need someone to help out in the Veterans Home campus store on Tuesdays & Wednesdays from 10:00 AM to 12:00 noon. The Home has organized its own Jug Band and we really need a guitar player too!”

Perry adds, “When we can match a volunteer’s interests with our residents’ needs we can usually make everyone happy.” NHVH volunteers must be at least twelve years old and go through an informal orientation. Each volunteer is supervised by a staff person. For more information about volunteering and a tour of the Veterans Home, please contact Lisa Perry at (603) 527-4449.

The New Hampshire Veterans Home was established in Tilton in 1890 as the Soldier’s Home for Civil War Veterans. One of just four New Hampshire nursing homes to win the 2007 Quality of Life Award from the NH Department of Health & Human Services, the facility is home to 200 men and women who have served their country and fellow New Hampshire citizens. The mission of NHVH is to provide high quality, professional long-term care services to the Granite State’s elderly and disabled veterans. NHVH is the only long-term care facility in the Granite State that is dedicated exclusively to veterans.

Washington (AFRNS) – To “Leave no man behind” is a proud military tenet. It has a sacred meaning on the battlefield for the men and women of our armed forces, but it also has application in everyday life. Hundreds of thousands of veterans and their survivors are at risk of being left behind when it comes to the economic stimulus payments that will be paid this summer.

Congress passed, and President Bush signed into law, a provision to pay so-called “rebates” to Americans who file tax returns. In so doing, they also extended the payments to include veterans and Social Security recipients who ordinarily do not have to even file a tax return. The minimum payment for those who qualify is $300 for individuals and $600 for married couples filing a joint income tax return.

The payments will be calculated by the Internal Revenue Service based on tax returns filed now through the end of 2008 reporting income received and taxes due for the 2007 tax year. But since some veterans and their survivors do not make enough income to have to file a tax form, there is great concern that they might miss the opportunity to receive money coming to them.

This year, veterans who do not otherwise have to file anything with the IRS will want to send in a tax form in order to receive a stimulus payment, according to IRS officials. This applies to veterans and their survivors who receive certain pension and disability payments which are not taxable.

Veterans who have income other than veteran’s benefits and are required to file a tax return and pay taxes for 2007 have nothing more to do. Beginning this summer, they will automatically receive their economic stimulus payments after they file their tax forms. This would include people who receive non-taxable pension or disability payments from the VA, but who also work and earn enough to have to file and pay taxes.

But veterans who receive VA pension or disability payments, sometimes in combination with Social Security or Railroad Retirement Tier I payments (generally none of which are taxable) will need to file an abbreviated tax form this year so the IRS can send them the stimulus payment they are entitled to receive.

Here is how it works -- Those who have no tax liability and are not required to file a tax return may qualify for a minimum payment of $300 ($600 if filing a joint return) if they send the IRS a simple tax return that reflects $3,000 or more in qualifying income. For the purpose of the stimulus payments, qualifying income includes veterans’ disability compensation, and pension or survivors’ benefits received from the Department of Veterans Affairs in 2007. Specifically, compensation or pension received under Chapter 11, Chapter 13, or Chapter 15 of Title 38, U.S. Code will qualify.

§ Monthly payments to veterans of the armed forces who are disabled as a result of injuries or diseases incurred or aggravated during active service, i.e., who have “service-connected disabilities.” Payments vary with degree of disability and numbers of dependents (spouse, children).

§ Monthly payments to surviving spouses; children (if no qualified surviving spouse); and low-income parents of members who die in active service, or veterans whose deaths are “service connected” (the result of service-incurred or service-aggravated injuries or diseases).

§ Monthly benefits paid to surviving spouses, or to children if there is no qualified surviving spouse, of veterans whose deaths are not service connected but who suffered from total, service-connected disability for specified periods immediately before their deaths.

Also included are those who receive a disability pension which is monthly need-based payments to certain wartime veterans who suffer from permanent and total, nonservice-connected disability, or who are age 65 and older. Death-pension payments are the final category which are monthly need-based payments to surviving spouses, or, if no qualified surviving spouse, children, of certain wartime veterans.

Here is what to do -- Those who are not required to file a 2007 return but whose total qualifying income (including earned income, Social Security, certain Railroad Retirement and any of the veterans’ benefits stated above) would equal or exceed $3,000, should file a simple tax return reporting the income and benefits to establish eligibility. You can use a Form 1040A and report the total of your benefits on Line 14a, or you can use a Form 1040 and report the total of your benefits on Line 20a. Please note that both of these lines refer only to Social Security, but you should enter the total of all your benefits received there, whether your only benefits were veterans’ benefits, or a combination of any of the three (Social Security, Railroad Retirement, or veterans’). If you have any earned income, it is reported on a separate line, Line 7, of either form.

Your name, Social Security number and signature (those entries for both you and your spouse if filing jointly), as well as your address, filing status and whether or not you would like to receive your payment via direct deposit, are the only other items needed on the tax return. No other lines need be filled in. A sample 1040A showing the minimal information needed can be viewed on the IRS Web site at www.irs.gov and used as a model for completing the form.

Officials emphasized that people with no filing requirement who turn in a tax return to qualify for the economic stimulus payment will not get a tax bill. People in this category will not owe money because of the stimulus payment. The stimulus payments are not taxable.

More information on these economic stimulus payments is available on the Web at www.IRS.gov. Just click on “Rebate questions” link. IRS officials want to make sure that no one who is qualified for a payment gets left behind. (Courtesy of the IRS)

Washington (March 11, 2008) – To deal with a nationwide shortage of nurses and to improve the quality of care for veterans, the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA) has created a “Travel Nurse Corps” to enable VA nurses to travel and work throughout the Department’s medical system.

“VA is committed to putting health care facilities closer to veterans,” said Secretary of Veterans Affairs Dr. James B. Peake. “The Travel Nurse Corps will make it easier to bring our world-class health care professionals closer to veterans, too. And it will make it easier for us to shift personnel during times of crisis.”

The Travel Nurse Corps, headquartered at the Phoenix VA Health Care System, is beginning as a three-year pilot program. Initially, it will place as many as 75 nurses at VA medical centers across the country. The goals of the program are to improve recruitment, decrease turnover of experienced nurses and maintain high standards of patient care.

Under the program, participating nurses may be temporarily assigned to distant medical centers and clinics to help nursing staffs that have vacancies, to reduce wait times or the reliance upon contractors, or to maintain high-skill services and procedures.

On February 20, the Department announced plans to create a Rural Health Care Advisory Committee to enhance VA services to veterans in rural areas. The Travel Nurse Corps will work with this national VA panel to support VA health care in rural areas.

“Those who join the VA Travel Nurse Corps will become key members of a talented group of professionals who are dedicated to providing the best care possible to our nation’s veterans,” said Cathy Rick, R.N., VA’s chief nursing officer. “The program helps VA medical facilities address supplemental staffing needs while also ensuring there is a continued commitment to quality and safety.”

Those who become VA travel nurses are compensated for their time on duty and their travel. They also receive standard government per diem allowances, which include lodging, meals and incidentals.

“This program is competitive with the private sector. VA has state-of-the-art facilities, high-tech computer systems and professional colleagues second to none,” said Jacqueline Jackson, Travel Nurse Corps director at the Phoenix VA Health Care System.

The program is also designed to establish a potential pool for national emergencies and serve as a model for an expanded VA travel corps with nurses who have varying specialties. The program is designed to reduce the use of contracted nurses, thus preserving resources that can be used elsewhere to care for veterans.

To learn more about VA’s Travel Nurse Corps, visit the Web site at www.travelnurse.va.gov , email travelnurse@va.gov or call toll free at (866) 664-1030 or in Phoenix at (602) 200-2398.

Just a word to the wise. E-mail petitions are NOT acceptable to Congress or any other municipality. To be acceptable, petitions must have a signed signature and full address. Same with "prayer chains" -- be wary.

Almost all e-mails that ask you to add your name and forward on to others are similar to that mass letter years ago that asked people to send business cards to the little kid in Florida who wanted to break the Guinness Book of Records for the most cards. All it was, and all this type of e-mail is, is to get names and "cookie" tracking info for telemarketers and spammers to validate active e-mail accounts for their own purposes.

Any time you see an e-mail that says forward this on to "10" of your friends, sign this petition, or you'll get good luck, or whatever, it has either an e-mail tracker program attached that tracks the cookies and e-mails of those folks you forward to, or the host sender is getting a copy. Each time it gets forwarded and then is able to get lists of “active” E-mails to use in spam e-mails, or sell to others that do.

Please forward this notice to others and you will be providing a good service to your friends, and will be rewarded by not getting 30,000 spam e-mail in the future.

If you have been sending out the above kinds of email, now you know why you get so much spam! Check it out: http://www.snopes.com/inboxer/petition/internet.

Points To Ponder

The views expressed in the following article were deemed interesting enough by me to include in the newsletter. I take full responsibility and the content does not reflect the opinion of the members of the Post. Please contact me if these articles offend you. – Greg d’Arbonne

George Phillips of Meridian, Mississippi was going up to bed when his wife told him that he'd left the light on in the garden shed, which she could see from the bedroom window.

George opened the back door to go turn off the light but saw that there were people in the shed stealing things.

He phoned the police, who asked 'Is someone in your house?' and he said 'no'. Then they said that all patrols were busy, and that he should simply lock his door and an officer would be along when available. George said, 'Okay,' hung up, counted to 30, and phoned the police again.

'Hello, I just called you a few seconds ago because there were people stealing things from my shed. Well, you don't have to worry about them now because I've just shot them.' Then he hung up.

Within five minutes three police cars, an Armed Response Unit, and an ambulance showed up at the Phillips' residence and caught the burglars red-handed.

1. I was at the checkout of a K-Mart. The clerk rang up $46.64 charge. I gave her a fifty dollar bill. She gave me back $46.64. I gave the money back to her and told her that she had made a mistake in MY favor. She became indignant and informed me she was Educated and knew what she was doing, and returned the money again. I gave her the money back, same scenario! I departed the store with the $46.64.

2. I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get-one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said “buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one-get-one-free," she said, "so I guess they're both free" She Handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.

3. One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, “Where"?

4. While looking at a house, my brother asked the real Estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the north?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for some time, she shook her head and said, “Oh I don't keep up with all that stuff."

5. I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."

6. My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.

7. My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount.

8. I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, has your plane arrived yet?"

9. While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces."